So yes..my day still hasn't ended yet....
Dinner....let's just talk about that for a hot sec...
Apparently my (AWFUL) aunt, uncle and cousin are coming to dinner tomorrow. They will be here in the late afternoon. Guess who gets to babysit them?? ME!! great..not....ugh...Father will not be home until after them because he is rounding the hospital and mom gets to go to some concert with her friend...all alone again. But why not? I'm not worth a dime...please use me until I die.
Then father was getting bro 1 ready for bed and I was talking to the other kids. Mom had left to go out with her friend. We were discussing how mom is going to make us clean the house for her because she won't want to do it. Then FAther had the NERVE to tell me not to complain about mom in front of the kids!!!!!! WHAT??? Does he think they don't know about her? I was so f'ing pissed off. The kids know and don't like her. I'm so upset.
I got to go out with Zom tonight which was good. So glad to get out of the house. We saw, "Zookeeper." It was funny. Then on the way home I wanted to talk to her. Of course I chickened out. I am so stupid. Why would I try to talk to her? No one wants to know anything. If I really opened up she would leave just like everyone else. I'm good at that. I am so dumb. I don't know why I try, which is why I'm not anymore. If someone wants to use me..bring it. I am so out of control, so why not just do it? If I do things I did in the past...then I will. Who cares??
ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..I'm so tired. I'm going to try to sleep.
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